A few weeks ago, I was talking to a neighbor and somewhere in the conversation, as in all extended hillbilly conversations, the obligatory weather prognostications surfaced, and he volunteered that we were in fact about to experience an unusually cold winter. He’d noticed some things to which only an elder statesmen of the hills would pay attention, and among the ominous perturbations of nature that foretell extreme weather, most fur-bearing critters were sporting heavier coats than normal. Furthermore, and with a thoughtful gaze across the wooded hills as snuff spittle drooled down his chin, he expounded on the bases for his prediction – with regard to such nuances as migratory birds having left the environs somewhat earlier than usual and the lack of late summer rains, and any other such observations short of nuclear winter that might lend credence to his prediction, no matter how tenuous.

Of course, the locals around here invariably expect the worst of all possible eventualities, be it a horribly cold winter, wetter than normal spring, or unusually scant profits at the local flea market. Most folks here speak as though they have post-graduate degrees in pessimism. But you have to give them credit, they stay prepared for the worst. I once saw a local woman headed into Walmart with an umbrella tucked under her arm on a warm sunny day without a cloud in the sky. I’ve heard of some locals out here in the hills with ammo closets that would make most military armories blush, you know, just in case they might have to protect their property.

To make a long story short – as warm as the fall has been this year, and as ridiculous as the old hillbilly sounded talking about a super cold winter coming, well we just had one of the coldest November cold spells we’ve had since I’ve been in the Ozarks. The forecast looks like it’s gonna be very cold at least through Thanksgiving. As to the aforementioned umbrella incident, guess who the Walmart customer was that got to her car without being soaked from a sudden thunderstorm? And about the need for lots of ammo to protect property? We’re not there yet, thank goodness, but just to be safe, I’m thinking about stocking up.